Saturday, 12 August 2017

After The Flowers Die Review

After the Flowers Die: A Handbook of Heartache, Hope and Healing After Losing a child by Author Melanie Delorme

"Is it possible to survive the loss of a child?

Even though you might be feeling that the answer to this question is no, never, absolutely not; be assured that not only is it possible for you to survive, but you are also strong enough to thrive after this devastating tragedy.

The loss of a child creates a gaping hole in a parent’s heart that seems unbearable and the only people who truly understand your pain are other bereaved parents. Melanie is one of those parents and, in After the Flowers Die, she offers encouragement, hope and honest suggestions for how you can once again experience joy. 

This book is written in an easy to read A to Z format and covers topics that many parents may experience, such as anger, bitterness, birthdays, Christmas, hope, signs, and more. If you have lost a child and are feeling hurt and lost, this book is a great starting point for you to acknowledge your loss, celebrate your child’s life and find hope.

Are you ready to begin your journey towards healing?"

Amazon ~ Amazon UK ~ 

Melanie Delorme was a content English teacher, wife, mother, sister and friend when without warning she gained the title of bereaved parent when her eight-year-old son Garrett was accidentally killed in a hunting accident. Her road to healing brought her to write her first book. Melanie is involved with her local chapter of Compassionate Friends and is passionate about offering hope to other bereaved parents. She is currently living on a ranch in Southern Saskatchewan with her husband, Gerry, and their two children. 

Connect with the Author here: 
~ Website ~

5 out of 5 Stars

First off I must be honest... I did NOT want to read this book, but I am so glad I did! 

I don't do well with books that cause strong painful emotions. I find that life is painful enough on its own without triggering painful emotions ON PURPOSE. No my life is not awful mind you, I have a great life. But I hate crying and feelings of sorrow and grief with a passion! Which is one of the reasons I was resistant to reading this book at first. For those of you who are in my same emotional avoidance group rest assured this book is not wallowing in pain as I thought it would be.

Author Melanie Delorme has taken a incomprehensible topic and broken it down into understandable topics, all nicely alphabetised. Topics that actually apply to many different painful situations not just the death of a child. I had multiple miscarriages and had to move through my own grief but I have never had to, and hope I never have to, deal with the death of a full grown child. But there are many who have and the things they have to deal with from the large ( dealing with the death itself) to the small (dealing with the dead flowers weeks after the funeral) are discussed in a simple, easy to cope with, style.

I would recommend this book two 3 types of people; 

1 - Those who have suffered through the lose of a child. This book with offer hope, direction, and a sense of community

2 - Those who have a friend dealing with the death of a child. There are things that most of us would not consider unless we have been through it. But Melanie spells it all out for you. Want to know how best to help them cope? READ THIS BOOK.

3 - Anyone who interacts with other human beings, Seriously! We never know how our little comments can affect others. On the due date of my second miscarriage while in line at a shop some random stranger reprimanded my husband and I for being completely selfish because we chose not to have children, he honestly had no clue it wasn't a choice. The memory still stings 14 years on. 
No we can't remove all careless comments, we are human after all, but we can think before we say them. Just knowing that others have had to deal with will allow us to be more caring and less judgmental. I feel better able to cope should anything like this ever affect myself or anyone close to me.

Overall I enjoyed reading this book, yes I shed a few tears, but not as many as I thought I would. Instead of ending the book feeling depressed and wanting to wrap my children in bubble wrap, I simply felt peace and made sure I gave my kids extra hugs and kisses as they passed by me going about their business. Read this book, you will not be disappointed!

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